STOP ME IF YOUVE TOLD THIS SITUATION BEFORE: 5 MINUTES INTO A THE AVENTURE THE THIEF TRYS TO CLIMB A 10-FOOTED WALL AND THEN FALLS DOWN AND DIES. TIME TO ROLL 3D6 IN ORDER AND NOT PICKJ A THIEF THIS TIME, BECAUSE WHO NEEDS A SHITHEAD THAT DIES ALWAYS DOING A SIMPLE JOB!!!!

SO HERES DSOME IDEAS TO MAKE A FALL NOT MAKE YOU FLIP THE TABLE OVER AND SPILL THE TACO BELLL FOOD ON THE FLOOR. WHEN YOU FUCK UP A CLIMB ROLL TO CLIMB SOMETHING, INSTED OF A AUTOMATIC DAMAGE TAKING — ROLL 2D8 AND HOPE FOR THE BEST:

1 IMPOSSTIBLE!!! ROOL AGAIN

2 BROKED THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR ASS, ONLY 1-2 HP LEFT, CANT WALK OR FIGHT, NEED TO BE CARRIED AROUND BY FRIENDS. PROBABLY THESE ASSHOLES WILL LEAVED YOU FOR DEAD, MAYBE DIE AUTMOATIC WOULD BE A BETTER ONE1!

3 IV’E GOT GOOD NEWS AND SHITTY NEWS FOR YOU, WHAT DO YOU AWNT FIRST???? OKAY GOOD NEWS IS NO DAMAGE, YOU SURVIVE FINE! BAD NEWS IS ON THE WAY DOWN FROM DEADLY FALL YOU PRAYED TO A SUPER LAME GOD FOR HELP AND THEY MADE THE SAVE HAPPEN, SOMEONE TOTALLY DORKY LIKE ST. CUPBERTH OR PASQETTI MONSTER, OR A PETTY GOD OF LITING FARTS ON FIRE– NOW YOU ARE A OFFICAL CLERIC OF THAT GOD, SAME LEVEL AS YOU WERE THEIF.

4 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH YOU ON WAY DOWN BUT WHAT THE HELL, THE FLOOR BROKED YOUR FALL……… WHY THE HELL THIS THING SO SQUISHEDY???? OH YOU WOKED UP A TRAPPER, ROLL ON INITIATIVE…

5 YOU CATCH YOURSELVE FROM A BAD FALL ONLY SLIDE DOWN 10”-FEET, WHEW THAT WAS A CLOSE ONE!! A QUICK LEG STRETCH OUT TO MAKE THE SAVE IS A PANTS RIPPER AND NOW THERES A PROBLEMO: YOU STOLE SOMETHING REALLY IMPORTANT TO ANOTHER PC AND YOU DIDNT EVEN REMEMBER DO IT, BUT FALLS OUT YOUR BUSTED PANTS AND KNOW YOU GOT SOME SPLAININ DO IF YOU WANT HELP TO GET DOWN.

6 ACTCHUALLY YOU MADE IT UP BUT IT WAS REAL TOUCH AND GO. IT MUST BE THE ARMOR AND CLOTHES IS NOT RIGHT – TOO SCARED TO CLIMB AGAIN UNTIL CHANGE ARMORED AND CLOTHES TO DIFFERENT ONES.

7 HUH…….. YOURE OKAY. IT WAS ALL JUST A VISULATION EXERCISE TO HYPE YOURSELF UP FOR THE CLIMB, YOU DIDNT EVEN TRY YET. OKAY NOW GOT FOR IT! (ADD ++10% TO THE ROLL).

8 NO FALL BUT SHIT NOW YOURE STUCK IN THE MIDDLE, WHAT NOW HOTSHOT????????? ROLL TO KEEP CLIMBING OR IF YOURE ONLY 5 FEET UP YOU CAN PROBABLY JUMP DOWN NO PROBLEM.

9 A DEADLY FALL HAPPENS BUT NO SWEAT, ONLY YOUR MOST PRESIOUS ITEM OR USEFIL ITEM BREAKS THE FALL. BUT IT ALSO BREAKS 😦

10 YOU FALL FOR 1HP DAMAGE AND IT MAKES YOU RUB YOUR BUTT HARD AND SAY β€œOWWWWIE” AND A SMALL TEARS HAPPENS. ALL OF THE HIRELINGS LAUGH AND LOOK AT EACHOTHER LIKE, β€œWHO IS THIS SHIT HEAD AND WE ARE FUCKED IF THIS IS THE GUY IN CHARGE. ALL OF THEM SECRET TEAM UP AT NEXT OPPORTUNITY TO ROBB PARTY BLIND AND RUN AWAY.

11 THE FALL HAPPEN FROM A NOT TO FAR FALL AND NO DAMAGE IS HURT BUT THE SCARE IS REAL AND NOW YOU CAN NOT THIEF CLIMB AGAIN UNTIL YOU LEARN A LIFES LESSON ABOUT BRAVERY FROM A UNEXPECT SOURCE, LIKE A CHILD WITH MUMMY ROT OR A TROLL WHO CANNT DEGENERATE, OR READ POEM THAT MAKES YOU FEEL HAPPY+SAD SAME TIME.

12 YOURE A GONER FOR SURE AND YOU FALL HALFWAY THEN A BUNCHOF TENTICLES COME OUT FROM THE WALL AND GRAB YOU………….THANK YOU NICE MONSTER! OH SHIT NOW ITS TRY TO EAT YOU, ROOL INITIATIVE.

13 FALLS HAPPEN SOME TIMES ITS PART OF THE JOB. YOU FALLED BUT YOUR HEAD LULCKILY BROKED YOUR FALL. REROLL YOUR INT: IF YOU WERE WEARING A HELMET SUBTRACT 0, NO HELEMT = -3, IF YOUR NEW INT IS LESS THAN 3 YOU DIE IN YOUR SLEEP NEXT TIME YOU SLEEP. IF YOUR NEW INT IS MORE THAN OLD ONE CONGRATULUTIONS!!

14 YOU PREYED TO THE GOD OF THIEFS ON THE WAY DOWN AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW, THAT SUMBITCH ANSWERED. YOU GOT SAVED FROM CEERTAIN DEATH BYA REAL SCOUNDREL, NOW YOU GOT A THIEF QUEST TO DO FOR HER OR HIM (OR SAY NO TO A GOD, SEE HOW THAT WORKS OUT FOR YOU.)

15 OL’ SNEAKY PETE ISNT THE GOD OF THEIFES OR EVEN A PETTY GOD, HE’S JUST SOME WEIRD SPECTER THAT IS SUPOER INTO THEIFES, WHAT A TODAL WIERDO. ANYHOO, OL’ SNEAKY PETE USES SOME SPECTER MAGIC TO FLOAT DOWN YOUR FALL AND NOW HE FOLLOWS YOU AROUND AND TELLS YOU TO CONSTANTLY DO THEIF THINGS TO DO. HE’S BECOMES A JERK WHEN YOU DONT, TELLS MONSTERS THE PARTYS COMING, STEALS THINGS FROM OTHER PEOPLE SO YOU GET THE BLAME, ECT. HE ASLO EATS 50% OF THE TRESURE YOU KEEP. IF YOU CAN TRICKER HIM TO SAY HIS NAME BACKWARD HE GOES AWAY.

16 YOU DIDNT SURFIVE THE FALL TOO BAD, BUT YOUR GHOST CAN JOINS THE PARTY (ROLL FOR CREATE GHOST PC).

17 ROLL AGAIN TWICE TIMES.

BACK AT IT AGAIN

February 26, 2019

OKAY………….. WHERE HAVE I BEEN???!? AGOOD QUESTION FOR ANSWERING BUT I WILL ONLY SAY THIS: THE MOVIE TRON IS A TRUE STROY AND IT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU TOO!!

ANYWAYS TO GET BACK IN THE SWING OF THINGS, SLOWLY. FIRST: I CANNOT DO ENCOUNTER CRITICAL. THE SCIENCE WAS TO MUCH FOR ME. I GIVE UP, THE DREAM OF BEING A KLENGON IS DEAD 😦

SECOND – BUT I FOUND SOMETHING BETTER ——- TROIKA! SO THE GOAL IS TO TAKE CARCOSA IN ONE HAND AND TROIKA IN THE OTHER HANDS AND THEN PRESS TOGETHER AS HARD AS IMPOSSIBLE TO MAKE THEM TOGETHER AND YELL β€œTHERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!!”

A QUICK WARMUP POST – TROIKA! CITY HAS A NEIGHBORHOOOD THAT IS FULL OF CARCOSA PEOPLE. ITS A BAD NEIGHBORHOOD. 3 NEW CHARSACTER BACKGROUNDS FOR TROIKA!, OF CARCOSA PEOPLE WHOM LIVE IN TROIKA!

SUPERNUMERATOR
A BILLION YEARS FROM NOW IN THE FUTURE CARCOSANS HAVE SAY β€œNO!!” TO COMPUTERS AND ROBOTS AND MADE A SOSIETY OF ADVANCED SMART MATH PEOPEL. IN STEAD OF HANG OUT WITH THE OTHER NERDS, YOU CAME BACK IN TIME TO SHOW EVERYONE HOW SMARTER YOU ARE AND LAUGH AT THEM. BUT NOW YOU ARE IN TROIKA AND THE DAMN JOKES ON YOU, COUNTING CALORIES FOR RED PRIESTS TO MAKE A LIVING. IF YOU MAKE FRIENDS WITH A ZOANTHROP ITS A REAL ODD COUPLE SITUATION. SOMETIMES YOU TALK LIKE THE SESAME ST. COUNT.

POSSESSIONS
– COLORFUL SKIN COLOR
– ABRACADABRACUS (COMPUTATION = APPLE IIE COMPUTER)
– SLING
– MONICAL
– NOTEPAD AND PENCIL
– MULTIPLACATION TABLES

SKILS
6 MATHMOLOGY
3 EVALUATE
2 SLING FIGHTING
1 INDIRECT FIRE WEAPON FIGHTING
1 GAMBLING (GOOD AT ODDS, SHITTY POKER FACE)

ASISSTANT MUMMY WRAPPER
MUMMIES DONT WRAP THEMSELFS, KINDA OBVIOUS IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT. YOUR AT THE BOTTOM OF THE TOTEM POLE, RESPONSIBLE FOR KEEPING THE BUTT UNDER WRAPS AND ITS A LONG CLIMB UP THE PICKING ORDER TO BE BOSS OF THE THE BOOBS (HOW FUCKING KYLE GOT THAT JOB NOBODY KNOWS!!!!! !). SO YOU GOT THE HELL OUTA THERE – WANDERING AROUND THE PYRAMIDS TOUGHT YOU A THING OR TWO ABOUT CREEPING AROUND WEIRD PLACES AND YOU MADE OFF WITH SOME GOODIES ON YOUR WAY OUT. THE MUMMY GOT OFF A CURSE ON YOU AND NOW YOUR IN TROIKA WHICH IS NOT GREAT BUT ALSO NOT BAD AS FAR AS MUMMY CURSES GO, BUT SHE’S PROBABLY NEVER STOP LOOKING FOR YOU.

POSSESSIONS
– COLORFUL COLOR OF SKIN
– LOTS OF BANDAGES
– SISSORS
– A SMALL GOLD ITEM WORTH A LOT (CURSES THE NEXT PRESON YOU GIVE IT TO)
– SMALL POUCH FILLED WITH SALT

SKILS
4 AWARENESS
3 HEALING
3 ROPE TRICKS
2 SNEAKING
CLIMB 2
2 SISSORS FIGHTING
1 SLIGHT OF HANDS

ROPE TRICK: YOU CAN DO MORE THAN JUST TIE YOUR SHOES, YOUCAN MAKE A LASSO, FOOL PEOPLE WITH KNOTS, AND OTHER THINGS I CANT THINK OF THAT ARE ROPE-BASED. (FOR THE MUMMY GUY, THOSE LONG BANDAGES ARE KINDA LIKE ROPES)

SISSORS: LIKE KNIFE, BUT MIGHTY BLOW DOESNT DO DOUBLE DAMAGE INSTEAD IT CUTS A STRAP SO THE ENEMY ARMOR FALLS APART OR THERE BACKPACK FALLS OFF, OR YOU CUT THERE HAIR AND THERE SPECIAL POWER IS NOW GONE

CLEANER OF THE PUTRESCENT PITS
WHY ARE PEOPLE AWLAYS THROWING BODIES IN THESE PITS? ITS GROSS ENOUGH IN HERE ALREADY. THEY SAID TO YOU β€œHEY JOIN THE CULT IT’LL BE COOL, THE LURKERS A NICE GUY AND THIS OPERATION HAS REAL ROOM TO GROW.” THEN THEY HANDEDY OU A MOP AND BUCKET AND SAID GET TO WORK.’ YOU LEARNED SOME PRETTY WIERD SKILLS BUT AFTER A COUPLE MISADVENTURE WITH THE PENDANT FUNGUS YOU HAD ENOUGH AND JUMPED IN THE NEAREST MEASURLESS VOID. NOW YOUR IN TROIKA AND GUESS WHAT? IT SMELLS WORSE THAN THE PRIMAL GLOB! SHIIIIIIIIIT….

POSSESSIONS
– SKIN COLOR (WEIRD)
– MOP (CAN BE WEILDED AS A STAFF
– BUCKET (CAN BE WORN AS A HELMET OR SIT IN)
– BIO HAZARD SUIT
–

SKILLS
3 ACROBATICS
3 POISON
3 STRENGTH
3 STAFF FIGHTING
1 SPELL – CONE OF AIR

OKAY IA DMIT, NOT MUCH HERE WORTH THE PRICE OF ADMITTING BUT I’M RUSTY GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 I HAVE NEXT IDEA OF SOME DINOSAURS, WORKING ON A CARCOSA ADVENTURE, AND I WILL NEVER GIVE UP THE DREAM OF WRITING WRESTLING COMBAT RULES.